Turning 33

Well, today is my birthday. December 16. It's my 33rd such birthday and a day of great reflection. The older I get, the more reflective birthdays tend to be for me. How about you? I just can't stop thinking about how I got to be 33. How did this happen!??? I'm very thankful for my 33 years but I guess I never prepared myself for turning this age (Or any age, for that matter).

I posted on Facebook today that 33 is a strange age. What I mean by that is this: at 33 I'm neither young nor old, established or shaky. I just... am. I once again find myself in a "tween" category of life, where I'm nowhere close to college yet nowhere close to middle age. Gee, I guess you could say that I'm really close to "nowhere"! That's seems strange to me. I'll get over it when I'm 34, I'm sure...

When I was 22, I had specific hopes and ideals for my life. I wanted to be here or there, doing this or that, with this or that accompanying me on this life journey. I realize now how foolish I was to expect my life to follow any specific path, for none of us chooses our specific paths of life. It's not our job! It's God's job. Sure we make decisions and those decisions shape our journeys, but doors open and close not at our command but God's. He alone is the keeper of time and space. He alone can see the finish line of each of our lives (read Psalm 139:15-16). And He alone can wisely direct our steps — every time.


So as I look back on my 33 years and reflect this day, I can see God's hand guiding me to where I am. I never expected to (nor wanted to) end up 33, single, working at a church and financially scraping by in relative obscurity. At 22, I was going to be famous! The evening news! (see 1998 photo at right) Or ESPN! Top 20 records! But I'm glad I'm not 33 and famous.

I'm so very glad that God took me through the peaks and the valleys of life for 11 years because He taught me so much during that journey (and still is teaching me). There was a lot of pain. There was a lot of learning. And there was a lot of fight in my bones. But my faith is stronger. My humility deeper. Indeed, my knowledge of how faith and life interact has been shaped by my experiences.

At 33, I'm thankful. I know that God has more plans for me, though He has chosen not to reveal the timing of those plans. I don't know where and I don't know when. It can get frustrating and I can shake my fist at the sky but when the storm is over I know that the same God who guided me through the past 11 years — nigh, the past 33 years — will be with me in the next 33 years as well. He got me to 33. Why can't He get me to 66?

Count your blessings, self. And praise the Lord your God for number 33.

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